Rock-a-Bye

We are a family of routine. We have habits and schedules and rituals for every part of our days. Usually, those routines are what make our days flow well, with little disruption, but lately I've found one routine tiresome. The bedtime routine.

We've always had a bedtime routine. It has evolved from a chaotic frenzy in those first few weeks with Ian into something of a symphony with our now 4- and 5-year-olds . We all play our part and know what the other will do next. It flows from one movement to the next with grace and fluidity. And each and every night the routine and the day and the symphony of bedtime come to a close in the rocking chair.

Each of the boys has a rocking chair in his room. They were gifts from Nina and Poppy (my parents) before they were even born. They've been used almost every single day of the boys' lives. In the beginning they were used several times a day...at the very least for morning nap, afternoon nap, and bedtime. Recently they've only been used in the evenings as naps have long since been abandoned by the little boys that run through this house. A rough estimate of rocking three times a day for the first 18 months of life, then down to twice a day for the next 18 months of life, and then once a day from 3 years old on means Ian's chair has rocked him gently to prepare for sleep 3,650 times and Eli's has rocked him about 3,160 times. Figuring a conservative 20 minutes per rocking means that, collectively, Cole and I have spent over three solid months of our lives rocking our sweet little boys.

Lately, much less rocking is happening in this house. The boys are complaining they are too big to rock together. It's true. Two boys on one lap is impossibly crowded, and with Cole committed to the robotics team right now, I'm the only one available for bedtime rocking sessions. Ian is starting to think he's a little too old for rocking. While I disagree, I do realize that most children his age (he just passed that all important 5 1/2 mark) probably aren't rocked every night before bed. In fact, they probably haven't been for a while, but I enjoy it and consider it one of the most important parts of our day.

Last night I had the chance to rock with just Eli, and I could tell how utterly exhausted he was. When we were finished reading our stories I told him, "I'll just hold you and rock you until you fall asleep." He consented and snuggled in close, eyes shut tightly. We rocked and rocked, but I could tell he wasn't able to relax and drift off. Finally, he opened his eyes slightly and whispered so quietly, "I'm ready to just lay in my bed, mom" and my heart broke. I smiled as my eyes began to water and whispered back quietly, "Okay. Let's tuck you in."

I knew this day would come. All little boys grow into men, and it doesn't happen overnight. It happens gradually, one milestone at a time. Everyone warns you, "It goes by so fast," and you can't quite appreciate that when you're caught up in the middle of it all. But one day you finally see it, and you realize that that phase, that routine, that moment that you had come to consider a burden or tiresome was about to be nothing more than a memory whether you're truly ready to let it go or not.

So, I now find myself re-energized and ready to recommit to our routine that, in reality, is very dear and precious in my heart and not at all a burden. I can see the light at the end of this tunnel, and I can't slow down the speed at which we are approaching it. All I can do is hold on as long as I can and know that when the time comes I'll never regret wasting the opportunity to rock my boys just a little bit longer.

Lego Night

Last night was a lovely night. We sat down together to eat as family for the first time in weeks. Cole has been swamped with sponsoring this robotics team. Children of Urbana High School...do you have a clue as to how lucky you are that you get my husband four nights a week and every Saturday from January to April? DO YOU?! Eh, you won't understand it until you have your own family. And that's fine. I wouldn't have gotten it at 17 either.

Anyway, last night Cole ditched the robotics team (don't worry, they have other sponsors, too) and came straight home after work. Seeing him four hours earlier than usual was fantastic. He and Ian took to the rug after bath time to do some Lego building. For an hour and a half Ian worked quietly and diligently to build a firetruck while Cole watched and offered very, very, very occasional help. It was good for them. It was good for all of us.

I Want, I Want, I Want

I am currently dreaming of warm weather non-stop. I am so, so, so miserably tired of the snow and below zero temperatures this winter has provided (it's currently 3 degrees outside with an overnight low of -13).

So in my quest to immerse myself in warm weather dreams to block out my cold weather reality, I've been fixating, once again, on a pair of sandals I've been wanting for almost a year now.

Behold.

New Mexican in Olive by Aurora Shoe Company

Now, before you get all those-are-not-Danielle on me, let me explain why I want these sandals so very badly.

1.  They are made in America. That's right. These shoes are made in America USING American resources. Pretty cool, right?

2.  The company will also repair the shoes as time goes by. Isn't that great? Who hasn't had a pair of shoes that needed repair but couldn't really find the right person to fix them? Not all shoe repair shops can or will repair all shoes.

3.  The reviews. I love to read reviews. Generally, I only read the bad ones and marvel at how grumpy, ridiculous, and entitled some people are. But the reviews for these shoes are great! Everyone talks about how they've owned their shoes for 15 years and they still love them and the shoes are still in great shape.

4.  (This is the major reason) They are custom fit to your feet! You send in a tracing of your feet, and they make the shoes to fit your feet.

For some people this may not be a big deal. For me, it is HUGE. In my 31 years I have owned exactly ONE pair of shoes that fit my feet well. My feet are extremely narrow, and finding narrow width shoes in a size 10 is practically impossible. The one pair that I have owned (Brooks Adrenaline, 10 Narrow) are absolutely heavenly. If you haven't spent 31 years walking around in ill-fitting shoes, you just can't begin to understand the glorious appeal of custom fit shoes...and if you think you can, you still can't imagine it as much as I can. Trust me.

Don't you just want to slip these on your feet and walk down a quaint street in New England?

I asked Cole for these sandals for Valentine's Day, but he hates them thinks they are too far from my style. He told me that he completely understands my frustration and is fine with the idea of buying me a custom pair of shoes....but not these.

Maybe they aren't my normal style, but I REALLY like them. They just looks so comfy and inviting. Like they were just made for me. Oh, wait....

24 Days

Tyla, Jessica (my sister), Jessica (my bestie), me, Whitney, Hilary (my sister-in-law)

This picture was taken at my surprise bridal shower in 2006. (Hopefully, that explains the wardrobe choice.) Look at the bride-to-be. So thin by my current standards, but I remember being disgusted with how "fat" I was going to be at my wedding. In this picture I was roughly 20 pounds heavier than I was when Cole and I started dating. Oh, to look like that again....

Cole and I have been gearing up for some nutritional changes for a while now. It sounds silly that we've been preparing and not doing, but we had a plan and there was logic behind the madness. Monday we began our plan: a 24 Day Challenge. It's all explicitly spelled out for you. Everything you put into your mouth is part of the planning. It's exactly what I need...to be bossed around.

I stepped on the scale Monday morning, and I was heaviest I've EVER been in my life. I've gained another 30-ish pounds since this picture was taken. It was so depressing. But, I did it to myself. I eat crappy food, and I haven't exercised on a regular basis since the end of September. That's four months ago. Yikes.

Some friends of ours did this 24 Day Challenge in August and had amazing AND lasting results. It helped them really view food as fuel and get a grip on their bad habits. It's been really nice to have inspiration/support from them, and it's been nice to have Cole doing this with me for added support at home.

So, we're going to take things a day at a time. Slow and steady. Hopefully, I'll look like that young little bride again in the not-so-distant future.

My Famous Portrait

Today I was looking back through pictures on Facebook and came across a real gem.

About 2 1/2 years ago, my brother-in-law Ross, who has a very hilarious sense of humor and always cracks me up, was wandering around the art museum in St. Louis. He stumbled across a painting and flipped because he thought this painting looked just like me. His friend Jessica read his mind and instantly agreed with him without saying a word to each other. He sent me a picture, and I couldn't believe my eyes. I could honestly pass for the lady in the painting at the art museum. See for yourself and let me know what you think.

Me (obviously)

The painting in the museum...I don't know the title but I'm guessing it's something like,

"Lady Who Loves a Little Piece of Ass"

DISCLAIMER: The perceived resemblance was based on appearances from the neck up.

Cozy Toesies

I have discovered that I REALLY enjoy knitting socks. They're quick and easy to tuck in my purse to work on whenever I get the chance. Here is Eli's newest pair. He loves 'em, and so do I.

I've created a couple of little sock snobs, though. Now the boys love to wear hand-knit socks and don't really care much for mass produced socks. Can you blame them? The granola side of me (it's tiny and buried pretty deep down, but it's there) loves making and not buying them. I feel so wholesome.

Sweet little feet all wrapped in love.

Kindergartener in the House

First Full Day of School - February 2014

Recognize this kid? It's Ian, the Kindergarten student. Monday he started staying full days at school. He's reading and his math skills are taking off, so now he stays for "Kindergarten time." Since he goes to a Montessori school, he isn't actually "in Kindergarten" because they don't have grades. However, the work he is doing right now is the work that would be presented in Kindergarten classes in traditional schools.

Where did this little guy go? (Whoever would have thought these crazy cutouts on the porch would be so handy for gauging growth from year to year?)

First Day - August 2012