More Simplicity Parenting

To finish off simplifying our environment, we reduced the number of books available to each of the boys from well over 100 to only five or six each. I was stunned whenever I read this recommendation in the book, but after I read all of the reasoning behind the suggestion I was totally on board. The author says that parents think they are doing the right thing by giving kids tons of books (I know I did.), but in reality young children are SO overwhelmed by that many options that a large variety is in no way beneficial to them. The author also states that there are many benefits to reading the same story every day for months on end. It develops a sense of security in children since they can always count on the same happy ending, the story becomes such a part of them that they will begin acting it out like a play, and it helps develop a love of reading books for pleasure and not consuming books just for the sake of saying, "I've read all 30 books in the ______ series."

Just like with the toys, you don't have to get rid of the books (unless they are not age-appropriate), but instead you just store them away, out of sight out of mind, and wait until your child tires of the current selection and then refresh it.

Ian's book selection

Eli's book selection - The Lorax is also in the mix, but I couldn't find it.......hmmmm.

Initially, this was really, REALLY, REALLY weird to me, but after reading all of the author's reasoning behind the suggestion and thinking about the fact that the boys really only ask for five or six different stories at nap time/bed time, I was totally sold. Whenever the boys request a new book, I will be beyond thrilled to switch up the mix.

To round out simplifying your environment, there is also a section on wardrobes, but we already did everything in the wardrobe section, so there were no changes for us there.

Again, I highly recommend Simplicity Parenting SO strongly for any family that ever feels a little overwhelmed with all that parenting entails. Many of the steps the author gives in the book, we already did naturally, but I still took so much away from it.

Next up: Rhythm. While our days have always been very routine, sometimes even too routine for our own good, I got some GREAT ideas from the Rhythm section (haha) to make things even easier for us. So, keep reading!

Simplicity Parenting

I recently purchased a book called Simplicity Parenting: Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier, and More Secure Kids upon the praises of a mom in my Mom's group. She is the mother of three little boys, and while I'm not sure of their ages, I believe they are something along the lines of 6, 4, and 2. Uh, can you say, "Chaos?!" All I have to say is, God bless her. The thought of adding another boy to the line up at our house is, quite frankly, terrifying!!!!! So, if she felt as though the book helped their family, I was sure it would help ours.

The book offers advice on four aspects of everyday life, Environment, Rhythm, Schedules, and Filtering Out the Adult World. (For now the section on schedules does not apply to us because our kids are not old enough for structured activities/lessons.) The author gives very simple "guidelines" for how to simplify all aspects of life to create a calm, happy lifestyle for your entire family.

Let's start with environment. Now, I must say, that in comparison to many families we have very few toys. We really don't like "stuff" for our kids, we want them to have experiences. Cole and I have a "maximum capacity" rule when it comes to toys in order to keep the madness under control. Plus, we don't allow toys in the bedrooms. Most points made in the Environment chapter are things that we have done since Ian was born, but after reading the book I still gathered that our kids had WAY too many choices when it came to toys so I simplified. And to be quite honest, this INSTANTLY made me feel as if an enormous weight had been lifted from my shoulders.

This is it.  This in the entire toy selection available to the boys.

Each of the bins contains one category of toys.  I DON'T mix toys!!!! The bins contain stuffed animals, tractors, trains, Little People, cars and trucks, a hunting play set. Both of the plastic bins contain building blocks, Lego Duplo and Fisher Price Trio. We now have a toy library in the basement, and in order to have toys stored in the basement, the boys must be willing to trade one of the categories of toys currently at their disposal for the desired toys in the basement.

This is a box of quiet toys: puzzles, flash cards, lacing cards. This box has a lid but is readily available to the boys. I mainly put this together so I can easily provide Ian with quiet activities on the days he won't take a nap (a.k.a 29 days of any given month except February).

I am SO happy to be making these changes in our lives! Having an excess of stuff in this house makes it so easy to become totally overwhelmed in a very short time frame. If you noticed, we have NO electronic toys in the mix. I find them to be TOTALLY overwhelming, and why isn't there a law about the maximum volume a toy can have? Manufacturers make them SO damn loud!!!!

Simplifying GREATLY minimized the mess that can be made on a daily basis, and guess what. I already knew what the boys will play with in great depth, so those are the toys I kept, and they really don't even care the other toys are gone. This change makes Cole and me MUCH happier, and in turn, much better parents to be able to sit and play with the boys without being freaked out by the amount of crap accumulating in the course of a play session. There is a fairly decent chance that a couple of these bins may go down to the basement to simplify even further.

I paid less than $10.00 for a used copy of Simplicity Parenting plus shipping, and it was worth every last cent. I think that every parent should invest in this book, especially if you are a stay-at-home-mom in the midst of chaos everyday. We are going to be implementing MORE changes, but you'll have to wait until later to hear about those.  :-)

Before & After

Don't you just love a good Before & After?  I do.  Here's one for today.  Here is Eli's sock drawer before...

And here is Eli's sock drawer after.

Did you see the difference?  Yes!  It now contains big boy underwear, or as boys say, "skibbies."  And aren't they the cutest!

Ian wears Pull-Ups at night, but I have a feeling not for much longer.  He is consistently waking up to use the restroom during the night or waking up dry in the morning.  Yahoo!  Eli wants to be just like his big brother and always wants to wear a Pull-Up too.  Saturday Eli wanted to wear a Pull-Up, and I told him that if he used the potty, he could wear a Pull-Up.  Lo and behold, the kid hopped right up on the potty and earned his Pull-Up privileges.

I told Cole, "I bet I could potty train, Eli."

To which Cole responded, "Then why don't you?"

Huh.  Good point.

I had just bought a brand new box of diapers last week, and still have a full box in the closet, so I decided I would return the new box and buy some skibbies for Li-Li.  I asked Eli if he wanted to buy skibbies and he got the most hysterical look on his face and yelled, "Holy cow!"  I took that as a 'yes', and Sunday we went to Target to make the transaction.  Eli was allowed to choose his own undies, and he picked a very manly Thomas set.

Monday was considered the first official day of potty training.  He wore a Pull-Up under his skibbies for the first couple of hours of the day, and after the third successful trip to the bathroom, he refused to put the Pull-Up back on.  (You haven't lived until you've tried to make Eli do something he doesn't want to do.)  So, I gave him the old "You have to use the potty or you'll get your skivvies all wet, so you have to tell me when you need to go."  And you know what?  He did!  Totally not kidding or exaggerating; we did not have a single accident yesterday and he never went in the Pull-Up either!  We had a few false alarms, which I absolutely prefer to accidents, and at the end of the day, his skivvies were totally unscathed.  Yipee-ky-yie-yay!!!

I am in absolute shock at how easy this was.  I mean, Eli is frighteningly smart, but he is a bit of a firecracker, so I expected more of a fight.  But he is Ian's self-appointed Bathroom Aide so he was much, much, much more familiar with the process than Ian was when I started his potty training.  He asks to use the restroom, he uses it when we go in, and I am already basking in the glow of a diaper free life!  It is slightly bittersweet, as this was the last phase of "babyhood" remaining in our house.  Bottles and pacifiers have been gone for long over a year, two naps a day disappeared about 9 months ago, and I can't remember the last time the boys needed to be fed a meal.

This is so surreal to me.  We have two potty trained children, and the second one was an absolute BREEZE!!!!  I no longer need to buy diapers, and I must say that Eli's little hieney in a pair of skibbies?  Probably the cutest little thing I've seen in a while.  :-)

Bonding

After Cole and I put the boys to bed every night, we hang out on the couch together and yap about all of the funny things the boys said/did that day.  We basically just take ten to fifteen minutes to pat ourselves on the back for somehow managing to create the most perfect human beings in the world.  ; -)  Anyway, as we talked last night the conversation just worked itself around to the fact that Cole and the boys get very, very, very little time to bond, just the guys.  Obviously, someone has to put food on the table, and in order to do so Cole leaves the house around 7:30 each morning and comes home around 6:00 every evening.  By the time we are finished eating which is 6:30 at the earliest (our children are the SLOWEST eaters on the planet - Eli can easily draw a meal out to over an hour), we have 30-45 minutes of family time, depending on temperament, before bath time which is immediately followed by reading and rocking.

Cole and I agreed that we need to find a way to make sure that the boys are getting one-on-one, or more accurately two-on-one, time with their dad every day.  And to be perfectly honest, I wouldn't mind a few minutes in my day without a thirty pound body tightly attached to one of my legs.  Say what?!?!  Yep, it's true.

My mom got a copy of The Mother's Almanac for me when I was pregnant with Ian, and she bought The Father's Almanac for Cole.  These books are great!  They were first published in the 70's (Cole and I both have the original editions), so I'm not sure how much has changed in the Revised edition, but I'm guessing that some of the recipes that involve raw eggs (not kidding) have been removed. One of the things about having the older version is that it does not address computers/video games.  This isn't really an issue for us now because we don't have video games, don't let the boys use the computer, and have literally two electronic toys that are used only in the car.

This morning I busted out The Father's Almanac to see if some of the activities outlined would be a good fit for the bonding time we are looking to prioritize for Cole and the boys.  The book is 375 pages, and it covers a variety of topics in twelve chapters: The Grand Arrival, Babies, Job, Family, Providing, Every Day, Special Events, Teaching and Discipline, Learning with Kids, Playing with Kids, Working with Kids, Keeping a Record. 

It has been a while since I last looked through the book, and I was blown away by all of the suggestions that are now age appropriate for our boys.  There are all kinds of science experiments, tons of "nature" activities, 14 pages on homemade toys, shadow puppets, and so, so, so many more.  (I feel like Will Ferrell in Stepbrothers: "So many activities!")  I'm not sure which project/activity I'm going to plan first (I'll have to gather all of the needed supplies before Cole gets home), but I'm sure whatever we choose, the boys will just have a grand old time getting to do a special project with just dad.

Builda, Build On

One of the best things about having children, other than having the privilege of calling most wonderful little humans in the world "mine", is getting to play with toys again.  It's true, maybe a little immature, but totally true. I am SO glad that we have boys because we play with building blocks ALL the time!  I was never really into dolls, although I did have a pretty hard core Troll obsession.  When I was little I was always building with Legos.  Of course, mine were made by Tyco, were purple, pink, teal, baby blue, and white, and were called Dream Builders.  They were awesome and occupied me for hours.  I'm so jazzed that Lego has started a line of girl Legos, and I will DEFINITELY be investing in some sets for myself nieces.

Anyway, the boys LOVE building blocks.  We currently play with Lego Duplo blocks, courtesy of "The Godfather" (Kenneth) and his lovely wife, Lisa, and Fisher Price Trio blocks every single day.  My favorite thing about the blocks is that there is no actual toy or scenario.  It is all a product of imagination and the possibilities are positively endless.  If it were up to me, we could get rid of every single toy (other than the trains) and exist with nothing other than massive amounts of blocks.  This morning we rocked out to my Pure 80s CD and let our creativity run wild.

Two Happy Chums

Imaginations at Work

Eli wears the sunglasses ALL the time, but rarely over his eyes

Check out the make-shift "blinds" over the door windows.....Steak 'n Shake coupons and Eli's teeth brushing chart.  Tacky, yes......but this morning they served their purpose.

Little Bro admiring Big Bro

I will NEVER be able to live in a house without gigantic windows ever again.  7 ft X 7 ft windows are heavenly

Too Much in One Day

Yesterday was a wild day.  It all started with the dentist appointments.  We left the house at 7:50 in order to get there in time for our 8:30 appointment time.  I cut it WAY too close, as in, we walked into the office at 8:30.  After the appointments wrapped up, I decided to swing by Cole's office and surprise him with a short visit.  As luck would have it, Cole was in a meeting.  Shucks!

But, we had more things to do.  We headed out to the mall to meet up with my mom who happened to be in town.  The boys got to play at the mall playground while we waited for mom, and then we ate some pretzels and did a little shopping.  After we wrapped up all of that business, we went with mom to the credit union to wrap up some business.


We then parted ways with mom, got some gas, tried to visit Cole (still no luck), and headed for the indoor playground.  We got to the playground at 1:08.  We met up with my friend and her daughters and played until 3:50!  We then headed back to Cole's office for a quick visit because Cole was working late last night and I wanted the boys to get to see him and vice versa.  After we left Cole's office, we got some milkshakes at Sonic and came on home.  We got home well after 5:00 last night.

Last night when bedtime rolled around, Ian tucked his and Eli's super heroes from the dentist's office into bed on the couch.  He gave me strict instructions not to touch them because they needed sleep.  I told him that I needed to move them, but I would make sure they had a nice bed to sleep in.

We received some sweet Christmas treats in this box, and I almost threw it away the other day.

 It's a good thing I kept it.  It is the perfect place for super heroes to recover from fighting plaque and tartar all day long.

It was a good day, but it was WAY too much for one day for the two chums.  They were exhausted last night, and the extreme fatigue is not biting us all in the heiny today.  YIKES!!!

So, today we aren't going to do anything.  I mean nothing!  We are skipping Mom's Group today.  We are just going to chill out, play with toys, and lounge around in our jammies.  (That jammie part isn't that unusual.....but it sounds better to pretend as though it is.)

5th Time's the Charm

There are two days of every year that I absolutely, positively DREAD.  I mean, I'd rather go through childbirth again with no epidural.  I hate these two days so much, that I begin dreading them six months in advance.  As the day gets closer, I begin dreading it even more.  And in the last month before The Day, I think about it non-stop.  It becomes all consuming.  Of course, I am talking about Ian's and Eli's 6 month dental check-ups.

We go to a pediatric dentist and the staff and Dr. Hemann are FANTASTIC!!!!  I can not stress this enough.  The staff is incredible and know how to deal with children.  I first took Ian to the dentist when he was 14 1/2 months old.  It was right before Christmas, and Eli slept through the entire appointment.  It was one of my first two-kid adventures.  And it was horrible.  Ian totally freaked the hell out.  It was unbelievable.  But we went back six months later, and this time we put Eli in the chair as well.  (Yes, Eli cut teeth at six months.)  This appointment was again hellacious as far as Ian was concerned, but Eli was fine.  Then we came back six months later, and that appointment was beyond disastrous.  BE. YOND.  DIS. AS. TER.  I had to hold the boys on my lap one at a time, and an assistant had to hold them down on top of me in order to get ANYTHING accomplished.  NOTE:  Ian has "sticky spit" and needs to be seen on a regular basis to keep his teeth from discoloring.  We took plenty of breaks, and the hygienist was so patient, gentle, and kind.  But it was still absolutely horrific.  There was out of control screaming, yelling, kicking, thrashing, bawling, dry heaving, etc.  Keep in mind, the boys only get their teeth cleaned.  They don't have any decay or problems of any kind.  The next time was just as bad only Eli clamped down on the hygienist's finger and wouldn't let go.  She could not get her finger out of his mouth.  It was absolutely wretched.

Today was Ian's 5th six month check-up and Eli's 3rd.  I had been obsessing over this appointment for weeks. I never even mentioned it to the boys; I kept it all inside.  Some parents dread immunization day.  Hey, I don't like it either, but I would rather sit through 1,000 immunizations before sitting through a cleaning.  A shot is quick and easy.  A cleaning?  It's an hour, MINIMUM, of restraining/consoling thrashing, screaming children who may or may not puke on you at any moment.

So, when we were called back for our appointments I told the hygienist, who was new to us, "I have to warn you, my kids hate this.  I don't mean, they don't really like this; I mean, they absolutely HATE doing this.  It's bad."

She replied, "Uh, yeah.  I saw that in their charts."

Yep.  My boys hate it so much that they have been "tagged" in their charts.  Honestly, it's probably why we had a new hygienist.  Our regular hygienist probably saw today's schedule and went home "sick."

We decided to let Eli go first.  I climbed into the chair and snuggled the little man on my lap.  We got all into position, and I braced myself.  Then something weird happened.  It was the easiest doctor's appointment, of any kind, that we have EVER had!  He never flinched, thrashed, shed a single tear, jerked, yelled, whined, or anything else.  He was absolutely perfect!!!!  I was so shocked at the end of the cleaning I couldn't even put into words how surprised I was.  We finished our appointment 10 minutes ahead of schedule because we never needed a single break to douse Eli with holy water.  I was blown away.

Ian was up next.  When Ian came over to the chair, he just hopped right up into it.  I asked if he could get up so I could sit down first, and he told me that he wanted to sit by himself.  Uh, pardon me Ian?  Speak into my good ear?  No, he really wanted to sit by himself.  So the hygienist got him a booster seat, and the rest was history.  He never flinched, thrashed, shed a single tear, jerked, yelled, whined, or anything else.  He was absolutely perfect!!!!  I was so astounded by the end of HIS appointment that I talked to the hygienist about it for a very long time while waiting for the dentist to come check things out.  We finished Ian's appointment early as well, and we were out of the office 20 minutes ahead of schedule!!!  HOLY COW!!! I have been walking on air ever since.

Since the boys were such champs, we came home with lots of goodies!  Brushing charts, tooth brushes, floss, Flosser Man, stickers, and super heroes.....  You can make personalized brushing charts for your kids, too!

 The Loot

This little dandy is "Flosser Man."  Kind of looks like a person, right?  Well, Ian's teeth are starting to get closer together in the back, so Cole and I have the distinct privilege of flossing his teeth every night.  You have to wind new floss everyday, and the winding/wrapping/threading routine is slightly ridiculous, but if it keeps me from getting bitten, then Flosser Man to the rescue!  He really didn't mind it today, so I think we'll be fine.

So, all in all, we had a FABULOUS day at the dentist.  No decay or any other problems of any kind.  We go back in July, and I'm hoping that the appointment will go just as well as today.  But talk to me in June and we'll see if I'm still as optimistic.