Good-bye, Santa

We did it. We told the boys that Santa Claus is not real. Before you flip your lid and start thinking about what a monster I am, just take a second to consider the fact that we live with our kids and we know them better than anybody else and we feel that we did what was best for our children.

Ian has NEVER found the concept of Santa to be entertaining. You can SEE distress on his face every time he talks about it. He started questioning Santa and commenting on how none of it makes sense when he was four. We neither confirmed nor denied his suspicions. This year he flat out asked me, "Is Santa real or not?" One of Ian's greatest qualities is his unwavering honesty, and Cole and I praise him for his honesty all the time. Honesty can be a hard pill to swallow, and Ian will. not. lie. It's so very admirable. Given the fact that the thought of Santa never brought joy, only stress, to Ian's life and that honesty is one of the very most important character qualities we want to develop in our boys, we had to let Santa go and tell the truth.

We told the boys about Saint Nicholas and how Santa was inspired by Saint Nicholas and the discussion just evolved from there. Eli started acting silly and tried to ignore the conversation. That's Eli's natural reaction to anything that makes him uncomfortable, and I know his little heart was breaking. Ian was quiet for the longest time and then asked, "Why did you tell me this?!" I was flabbergasted and quickly retorted, "You asked me!" He said, "No, I didn't!" And then this whole argument ensued. He DID ask me! I did not make that up. I'm pretty sure that Ian was upset because while he knew in his head that Santa didn't make sense and wasn't real, his sweet little six-year-old heart wanted it to be true.

We decided to tell both boys at once because we didn't want Ian to have to keep a secret like this, and we also wanted to let Eli down easy...if that makes sense. It was a sad day for me because I remember believing in Santa and the magic of Christmas. It was so much fun. But that was not the case for Ian, and unfortunately Eli was caught in the middle. I think we'll still wait until Christmas morning to lay out the gifts, so there will still be excitement, and we made it very clear that this MUST remain a secret from other children we know that still believe and we came up with a vague response to give when people ask questions like, "Is Santa going to come to your house?" I think we covered everything, but who knows.

When it was all said and done Eli whispered in my ear, "Since there's no Santa, I want to tell you that I want the biggest train set from Brio, okay?"